Hi! My name is Electric Bubbles or just Ellie, if you like. I was born on the 4th of July, four years before the century, the fourth child of eight: four boys and four girls. I was named Elizabeth so that my parents could call me Ellie. See, we have a tradition in our family to name the kids one thing and call them by another name that has to end with an “ee” sound. Before me was William (Billy), Ruth (Ruthie), and Gennifer (Gennie). After me came Edmond (Eddie), Jonathan (Jonny), Grace (Gracie), and James (Jimmy). We also have a cat, Kitty, who came when Gracie was a baby.
When I was a baby, I was either very, very happy, or very, very un-happy. Rarely was I calm or just content, except in my baby swing. This character trait has continued to this day. I’m either hyper, happy, and bubbly, or I’m depressed, moody, and angry. (Or, I’m in a zone, and if I’m in a zone, God help the person who interrupts me. Fair warning, don’t interrupt me on the piano.) Rarely am I someone in between happy and sad. Does that make me bi-polar? I’ll have to look that up. I’ve wondered before if I have some kind of personality disorder. But in my honest opinion! I don’t think some of these disorders should be called disorders, they’re just personalities. I don’t like labels and boxes. I hate being told what to do or who I am. A friend asked me recently (very politely) if I might have a bit of ADD or ADHD. I don’t. I think a lot of kids with ADD and ADHD really don’t have a disorder problem, they have a discipline problem. Spank that kid and make him happy! Of course, that’s only true in some cases. But I digress. I don’t have ADD, but I must be moving to pay attention to, say, a sermon or a seminar. I actually don’t have to be moving, but I need my eyes focused on something. I usually doodle. Occasionally I take notes. Sometimes I will make a cloud of words by just scribbling whatever word the speaker is saying at that time. Sometimes I’ll trace my finger along something back and forth. I just need something, otherwise I will begin to daydream. Doodling doesn’t mean I won’t daydream, but not doodling (or something of the sort) means I certainly will!
But I don’t think I have a personality disorder. I am kind of crazy though, or people tell me I am. Why am I crazy? Does everyone have these crazy thoughts and feel like saying crazy things? I bet I’m not crazy, I’m just brave. I’ll say things we’re ALL thinking! Ha! So you are crazy too! I like to think that anyway.
I’m not always crazy though, sometimes I’m just plain, straight-up awkward!
Okay, here’s the actual truth. Sometimes I’m a genius, sometimes I’m a clutz. Sometimes I’m hilarious, sometimes I’m just sweet and sensitive. Sometimes I reply super quickly and say the most embarrassing things, sometimes I’m more thoughtful. Sometimes I’m outgoing, sometimes I’m shy and very quiet. Some people say I’m brilliant and a deep thinker, some people say I’m shallow and naive. How can I be all of those things? Because I’m a responder. I react differently to different people. It’s the strangest thing. Sometimes just by the way they nod their head or phrase a question, I can feel words bubble up or simmer down. I can know two people of the same personality type and be able to communicate with only one.
Understand, I am not being fake. It’s a natural reaction. If I tried to act the same around everyone, then I would be fake. I read this on an ENFP description once. My personality type is that of an ENFP.
See, I told you I didn’t like labels, but I lied. I’m a walking contradiction, and in a few moments I’ll tell you why that isn’t true either. First though, let me say that I love reading ENFP descriptions because I feel a deep part of me resound with the feeling of not being alone. Also, while I act different around everyone and every group, eventually, when I’ve been friends with someone long enough, I find myself acting with them like I act with my siblings at home. When they still love me, I know I’ve found a best friend.
Okay, so do I contradict myself? No. I mean yes, but I don’t contradict some things. I have values, morals, and mindsets that are firm. There are certain values, and I didn’t choose them myself, that I can’t compromise. Among those are: loyalty to friends, availability to those in need, general kindness to every person, individuality, thinking the best of every new person I meet, loving someone for who they are and like they are. I can honestly say that if I have bad feelings toward anyone, it doesn’t ever settle well, ever. In general, I like people, all of them. And if I find myself disliking someone, it weighs heavy. I hate the feeling and have to get rid of it. I do.
Yeah, that’s just a few details about me.