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Help from my Writing Buddies (and everyone else)

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I have come up with several story ideas. They are a bit depressing, probably mushy, and will take a lot of research. But I really want some ideas and input. They all have problems.

Here’s the first:

The Main Character is a 23 year old young man wants revenge on his father. Between ages 1-13 his father only showed up randomly when drunk and abused him and his mother. He blames his father for his miserable childhood and all problems since, and for all his mother’s health problems. When he was 13, his father went to prison for 10 years. While in prison his father wrote MC, but MC always burned the letter without opening the envelope. Now his father is being released and he is getting ready to hunt him down and kill him for all he did to him and his mom.

Possible Opposition –
His mother is still alive begging him not to?
His father is fierce and dangerous?
His father is defenseless and harps on MC’s conscience?
His father is now a Christian and begging for forgiveness?
MC becomes a Christian?

Obviously, the problem with this story idea is that I don’t know which way to turn the story. Any help? You can throw out as many ideas as you have. I’d love them.

 

Here’s the second:

Leny is a 14 year old Mexican girl. Her family, which includes grandfather, aunts, uncles, 2 siblings, and 10 half siblings or cousins, live in three small shacks on the edge of the city. Her older brothers have each grown up to work for the cartel. Her brother Carlos who is 15 will be working for them in just a matter of time. They don’t have much of a choice.
She takes care of the small children and goes to school when she has time. But she has only a few changes of clothes, usually not enough food, her grandfather, father, and uncles get drunk regularly.
How does she get out of this situation?

The problem with this story idea is that while the situation is heart wrenching and gripping, I don’t know how to get her out of it. And even more difficult, how does one get the whole family out of such a situation, especially when this has been going on for generations? The most depressing part of this story is that I’ve met Leny personally, she’s a real girl, and her situation is only one of many like it.

 

Here’s the third and longest idea:

This idea is actually many combined. It could even be joined with the second story idea.
The MC is a single Mexican mom near the Texas/Mexican border. Her teenaged son has duo-citizenship. For this reason he feels out of place in both countries. There are several cartels in Mexico, some kill and kidnap, some stick to distributing drugs. The son went to the “good” cartel to work for them and get their protection for him and his mom. His mom is kidnapped one evening by the “bad” cartel and questioned about her son’s activities. She knows nothing so is let go. She fights with her son about it, and they determine to leave suddenly and swim the river.
They do. Right now (believe it or not) if you are caught as an illegal alien, you are given a check up, all your shots, food stamps, maybe more—which is more than you get if you come across legally. Then you are released and told to show up for a court date. No one ever does. The system is wack! Obviously, I’ll need to do more research. But anyway, the mom and her son can also get help from a charity organization to make her legal.

2nd part of story: The mom gets training as a nurse and gets a job at a Planned Parenthood clinic. She loves her job and is finally providing for her family.
But her son struggles hard with depression. He can’t fit into the school system very well, and doesn’t have a community or any friends. His mom tries to help him with grades, but it only serves to make him believe her love is highly conditional. His grades improve, but his depression is deep.
Someone finds out his mom is an abortion clinic nurse and tells him about all the horrors of abortion. They spare him no anger or accusation. Again, his depression grows stronger.
Finally he finds out that in order for his mom to counsel women to get an abortion she tells them that she wishes she had had the resources to get an abortion when she wasn’t ready. (Horrifically, such things have been said.)
So he kills himself. 😥 See why these are so depressing?
He would probably leave a note explaining to his mom why he killed himself, and also explaining to her the horrors of abortion that have been told him.
She quits her job and becomes a pro-life activist in honor of her son. Through that, she meets a church and finds a real community for the first time in her life. And this is so sad, because her son never lived to find a community, nor acceptance in Christ.

Anyway, what are your thoughts on that story? The thing might be mushy and depressing, but with good research and a lot of work, it can reveal a lot of the problems in Mexico and in abortion that aren’t common knowledge.

 

So what I want to know is

  1. Which story would you most likely read and refer?
  2. And what ideas do you have for that story?

 

Thank you SO much! If I don’t get help for one of these I might go insane!

~Ellie

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21 thoughts on “Help from my Writing Buddies (and everyone else)

  1. I like the last idea best! Although the main character dies, I think it could be a good way to capture the reader’s attention and get your point across in a strong and emotional way. However, I’d say that focusing in on one main point to bring across would be best. For example, you could mention cartels, illegal immigration, and abortion, but make one of those topics the main issue you’re addressing.

    Those are all great ideas! I’d definitely read any and all of them if they were books! 🙂

    • That’s a really good point! Do you think I should make two books, or is that stretching it? Now that I think about it, these probably wouldn’t be the main point of the story. The point would be like, the need for love, or the way to find peace, etc. I’d have to think about what I want to center on. I have a lot to think about!
      Thanks so much! ^_^

      • I think it could easily be two books! Maybe one could be more about the son and the other more about the mom? Just a thought! 🙂 I’m excited to see what you come up with!

  2. Those are great ideas! I like them all….but I think the most interesting one to me is the Last one. Even though it’s a little depressing, it’s a moving story line and deals with several important issues.
    But I’m not good at stories, so you don’t have to count my opinion. ;P Hahaha!
    I know what ever you do will be wonderful!

  3. yeah, i think the last one is the most developed, i also like the first one……my attempted story is kinda like that, i have so many ideas, now how do i fit it all together?? 😛

  4. The first story is packed with theological significance from multiple angles and they all need to be fleshed out. You won’t be able to develop MC’s story until you develop the dad’s story, then intercut them with each other. There needs to be a “conscience” character in MC’s life, reminding him that he does not know the man who is being released, because he has chosen not to know him.

    Leny gets out of her situation because she meets you (or the like) and your dad is on the missions trips with you. This, plus the Gospel message, gives her the revelation that substance abuse is not all there is. The patriarch of the family gets all hero and determines to rescue her from these strangers that are telling her all those lies only to hear the truth for the first time. He learns about freedom, and that it has nothing to do with money or power or intimidation, but with repentance and self-sacrificing love.

    The third story has some powerful, powerful scenes, such as the son confronting his mom that she wishes he had never been born (what more horrible attitude could a mom have for her own kids?) I had the blessing of offering gentle correction to such a mom before I confessed Christ, and, after that correction, the son that she had so wished about became her favorite. Don’t discount the possibility of repentance before faith (that, for the sake of her son’s fragile heart, she abandons the abortion clinic and becomes pro-life before he dies). In any case, this is a trilogy, not one story: the flight from the cartels, the abortion situation, and finally, the coming to faith.

    • Wow! This is really helpful! I’ll keep this on file.

      1st, It would be very good to make a good backstory for his dad. I hadn’t even considered that before. Would you think his mom would be his “conscience character”?

      2nd, to get out of her spiritual state is one thing, but to get away from the cartel is something else. You must move suddenly, drastically, and stay hidden. Leny’s family had none of the resources to do so. And you can’t just say no to the cartel.

      3rd, three stories might be best so I can center on each of them, but I don’t want to feel like I’m stretching or floundering around for scenes to fill the book. I’ll have to do some freeplanning to see if I can find enough good content that would make three separate books.

      Thanks again!

  5. Wow… I don’t think I have much to add to what the others already said, especially Mr. Maddock. But I do have a few small ideas…

    There are several Muslim terrorist groups that have said they will attack America by striking our “week underbelly” and coming across the unprotected Mexican border. You could add in one of these groups (or make one up) for one of those stories to add a twist, though it probably wouldn’t be worth trying to incorporate it. It’s just one of those randoms things that popped in my mind.

    For the first story, maybe you could have the father become a Christian in prison, but when he gets out, the bad group of guys that he used to hang around (maybe a biker gang, or something like that) tries to get him to come back to his old ways. Maybe he owes them money, or hid some money the group had stolen together, and now that he’s out, they want him to give it to them. Whatever the case, they try to contact him, the son finds out, and that only enforces the son’s belief that his dad hasn’t changed, even though the dad is trying to convince his son otherwise.
    Maybe the group of bad dudes tries to kidnap the mom or son and use them as leverage to get the father to give them the money?
    For the climax though, maybe the son and father have no choice but to team up to fight off the gang (or something like that), reconciling their relationship. I don’t know, this is just what popped into my head.

    As for Leny, I think the key to getting her AND her family out of their physical situation is to have something happen to the cartel. Maybe if the majority of the men working for the cartel came to Christ, or maybe just some of the leaders, it could be dissolved. Or maybe a rival cartel cripples it or wipes it out. Or maybe the Mexican government decides to do something about this cartel. Those are my ideas.

    As for the third story…Hmmm. That IS depressing. Don’t forget to emphasize hope (especially the hope of the Gospel) when writing stories like that.
    Maybe the son feels like the only place he fit in was the cartel, so maybe he tries to go back to Mexico, since he becomes convinced that his mother doesn’t love him? And maybe the mom, after realizing what she’s done and becoming a Christian, decides to go back and try to find him? Personally, I think that would me interesting than if he died, especially without reconciling his relationship with his mother. But if his death is necessary, he could still get killed in a cartel battle or whatever, and his mother finds him just in time for him to die in her arms, but not before they are reconciled.
    But if going back to Mexico is too far fetched, he could end up joining a gang inside America, because that’s the only environment he feels accepted in. Maybe he feels that way because cartel and gangs value his skills more than other people do (perhaps he’s exceptionally strong, fast, or good at shooting).

    Okay, maybe I had more to add than I thought, haha. Those are the ideas that popped into my head… personally, I don’t know which story idea I like best! They all have such potential!

    • Wow!
      1st, I really like the idea of him NOT killing his dad, but carrying hate inside until they have to partner to do something…..AHHHH! There’s so many possibilities for this story! I got a bunch more from Eddieboy at church. Like shooting his dad with a gun, but his hands are shaking so bad, the bullet only grazes his dad’s head. Blood goes everywhere, his dad falls down, and MC runs out and goes into hiding thinking he killed his dad–but he didn’t! I might have to come up with different scenarios for several of the best ideas.

      2nd, I didn’t even think about doing something to the cartel. Yeah, that makes a lot of sense! Haha. Definitely something to think about.

      3rd, I like the idea of him getting into a gang. Maybe if he then broke a foot or something and was disabled and no longer useful, that could add to depression. (You’d almost think I WANTED him to be depressed!) But this idea of him killing himself came about by me hearing about an abortion counselor saying, “I wish I had had an abortion 16 years ago,” and what if the son heard that and then killed himself. I think it would quickly become clear that she wasn’t telling the truth. No mom would ever believe that. Also, it would heap guilt on the mom, who would then realize how hopeless she is to guide her own life, and would drive her to God.
      Originally the mom was the MC anyway, so it wouldn’t be like the MC kills himself.
      Anyway….I’m writing out a timeline for the last story idea and then am going to mess with it until I like it….enough. 🙂

      Thanks

      • Well, glad I could be of service. 🙂

        3rd, I actually just saw a news headline that said “Gangs using border as recruiting hub…” so it’s certainly a plausible idea.
        Well, when you put it that way, I guess he kind of has to kill himself, huh. 😛

        Well, I’m looking forward to seeing what you do with these ideas. Good luck! 🙂

    • Look! It’s ErenKenobi! Thanks for hunting down my blog and commenting. I feel way special.
      Actually, I’m working on writing the first draft to the first story idea right now. 😀 I really like it so far (that is, until I actually read it, heh heh.)
      A friend from church gave me some incredible ideas for it. I wonder if I should tell you know or let you wait and find out…..

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