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Hello, my friends

 

The world can feel like a tunnel sometimes. There is an end, I know there is, but where is it and what will it bring? And why am I not there yet?! Why is there so many ditches where I get stuck? Why didn’t someone poke a few air holes in the ceiling? And why is this icky mud that I ran into last week still hanging on me? Why can’t I get rid of my sin? How come I grow so so painfully slow? The spiderwebs of yesterday and the rocks in my boots all tell me very plainly that I am a traveler. Have you felt like this? Have you wondered at your own horrid feelings and wicked thoughts? I’ve been saved for 20 months and five days now, shouldn’t I be farther along? especially as I’ve been raised in a wonderful church for practically my whole life? But the road is long, and tunnels can seem so dark, and maybe you’ve felt like I have.

The devil seems to be attacking, yet not how I thought he would. Funny how that happens so often. It’s not the huge battle I thought would come, the one I thought I was ready for, it’s a small nagging discontent and bitterness. It’s my own thoughts that I wasn’t prepared to fight.

In other words, I haven’t much shared my thoughts on my blog before, but I needed to say how I feel currently and I also could use prayer. I know the way out of the tunnel, but not the way to get there, if that makes sense. It’s like I know I should turn left, but not sure where to turn left, not sure where to place my foot, and how to keep my balance as I turn.

And now after my babbling, I’ll be posting more of Jonny’s story progress later on.

signed

-Electric Bubbles

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9 thoughts on “Hello, my friends

  1. OH, Ellie, YOu know that I shall be praying for you…Not only in this time but always…YOU, shouldn’t get discouraged when hard trials arise..Yes, they are tough, and the road seems ever dark ahead…your destination, uncertain, Not your eternal destination, but the one that this trial leads to. You feel like you shall never make it, you feel you can’t take another thing to fall atop you…for if it does you will be utterly crushed by the weight of it. But Ellie, God knows how much you can handle, he’ll never leave you, never forsake you. He’ll always be there, when I can’t He’ll always know JUST how you feel when I don’t. I can’t comfort you like he can, I can’t tell you how to fix the problem, but he can. You can’t trust me not to fail you, for if you put your trust in me I will always fall short and FAIL you! GOD never will, you can always trust him with EVERYTHING. Just think of David, he was a “man after God’s own heart” but what did he do? He took a mans wife, then had him killed…But he was a man after God’s own heart? People are people, our nature is to sin, but We were made in the image of God…We in our Christian walk “strive” to be “Christ Like” we must never give up, when you feel you can’t go farther, push harder, look to God. ” Looking unto Jesus, the author and finsher of our Faith,” read Hebrews 12:, Never lose heart…Think of Job, he lost all, he was a Christian…think Of Moses, All of them had trials, struggles, Jacob wrestled with God. Girl, you aren’t the only one things like trials come upon, I have my faults, many they are! I feel often as you do, but when I feel so, I must trust God all the more…It’s in times like these, the discisons we make, that’s what makes you who you are….! We will NEVER know WHY…Just WHY, all this happens…but we aren’t meant to….we are not made to…we are made for OUR SAVIOUR…!

    I LOVE YOU ELLIE! I am praying for you…May God reach down his hand and comfort you.

    Love your friend, Leah

    • Thank you Leah. *sniff* :`) I love you too. I know I should be thinking of all these things, but really, I forget so much. God knows how much I can hold, so I shouldn’t be afraid to stay strong.

  2. I love you Ellie, and God WILL help you through this… NEVER doubt that… ❤ He loves you so amazingly much, He loved you enough to give his one and only Son to DIE for you… even before you were born He loved you enough to do that. He is the same past present and future; He did not let you fall then. He won't let you fall in the future. He will not let you go now

  3. I wish I could say I didn’t know what that was like, but unfortunately I know all too well. Leah has said some wonderful things, so there isn’t much left for me to say. But I’m going to talk anyway. 🙂
    First, I encourage you to focus on Christ. You’ve recognized your sin and areas of weakness, and you’ve repented. Now, don’t look back! God has forgiven you, and given you the strength to move on. I know you know this, but sometimes it helps to be reminded. When you find yourself struggling, focus on Christ. Meditate on Him, on what He’s done, and especially on His Word. You will not find the way out of the tunnel by looking around at it, only by keeping your eyes fixed on the Light at the end.
    Second, don’t make getting out of this tunnel your goal. Your goal is Christ-likeness and glory. If you concentrate on getting out of the tunnel, you might eventually, but it will be a long, discouraging road. Concentrate on Christ, not on your weaknesses but on His victories. Maybe when you reach the end you will have a huge celebration. I’ve found more often, however, that I don’t realize that I’m out of the tunnel for a long while, because getting out involved being obsessed with Christ, and my obsession (pitiful as it always is) blocked out the struggle around me.
    I love you so much, Ellie, and I hope that this has been an encouragement to you! I’m praying for you, dear sister!

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